MONDAY
*******************************
Willow (to Riley): "OK, she's wearing the halter top with sensible shoes. That means mostly dancing, light contact, but don't push your luck. Heavy conversation's out of the question. If you hurt her, I will beat you to death with a shovel.
A vague disclaimer is nobody's friend. Have fun!"
---(The Initiative)
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Fortune Cookies:
Dana: "Okay, but after dinner, I don't want you putting any of your old cheap moves on me."
Peter: "Ohhhh no! I've got all new cheap moves."
---Ghostbusters II
"The best advisers, helpers and friends, always are not those who tell us how to act in special cases, but who give us, out of themselves, the ardent spirit and desire to act right, and leave us then, even through many blunders, to find out what our own form of right action is"
---Phillips Brooks
"A man on a date wonders if he'll get lucky. The woman already knows."
---Monica Piper
Harriet Michaels: "What do you look for in a woman you date?"
Charlie Mackenzie: "Well, I know everyone always says sense of humor, but I'd really have to go with breast size."
---So I Married an Axe Murderer
TUESDAY
**************************************************
Spike : "I don't understand. This sort of thing's never happened to me before."
Willow : "Maybe you were nervous."
Spike : "I felt all right when I started. Let's try again. Ow! Oh! Ow! Damn it!"
Willow : "Maybe you're trying too hard. Doesn't this happen to every vampire?"
Spike : "Not to me, it doesn't!"
Spike :" I'm only 126!"
Willow : "You're being too hard on yourself. Why don't we wait a half an hour and try again?"
---(The Initiative)
************************************************
Fortune Cookies:
"The best cure for worry, depression, melancholy, brooding, is to go deliberately forth and try to lift with one's sympathy the gloom of somebody else."
---Arnold Bennett
There is nothing better than the encouragement of a good friend.
---Katharine Butler Hathaway
"You are special,
You're the only one,
You're the only one like you.
There is nobody in the whole wide world,
Who can do the things you do
Cause you are special, SPECIAL,
Everyone is Special
Everyone in his or her own way
Cause you are special, SPECIAL,
Everyone is Special
Everyone in his or her own way
Da da doo doo
da da doo doo"
--- ---yes, you guessed it. Its Barney. (sigh)
"Most of us, swimming against the tides of trouble the world knows nothing about, need only a bit of praise or encouragement - and we will make the goal."
Jerome P. Fleishman
WEDNESDAY
****************************************
Buffy : "So what I'm wondering is, does this always happen? Sleep with a guy and he goes all evil. God, I'm such a fool."
Willow : "Well maybe you made a mistake. But that's okay. Next time - what?'
Buffy : "Parker said it's okay to make mistakes. It was sweet.'
Willow : "No it wasn't. He was saying that so you would take a chance and sleep with him. He's a poop head."
Buffy : "You're right. He's manipulative and shallow. And why doesn't he want me. Am I repulsive? If there was something repulsive about me you would tell me, right?"
Willow : "I'm your friend. I would call you repulsive in a second."
(The Harsh Light of Day)
*****************************************
Fortune Cookies:
"Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty."
---Sicilian Proverb
"Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand."
---Karl Menninger
'Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art.... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival."
---C.S. Lewis
"Friends are the Bacon Bits in the Salad Bowl of Life."
---Pizza Place Sign
THURSDAY
******************************************
Willow: That, that-that wasn't just some temporal fold, that was some weird Hell place. I-I don't think you're telling me everything.
Anya: I swear, I am just trying to find my necklace.
Willow: Well, did you try looking inside the sofa ---in Hell?
(Doppelgngland)
*******************************************
Fortune Cookies:
"Honesty: the most important thing in life. Unless you really know how to fake it, you'll never make it."
---Bernard Rosenberg
"And that's the world in a nutshell, an appropriate receptacle."
---Stan Dunn
"I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect."
---George Carlin
"The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale."
---Arthur C. Clarke
FRIDAY
*********************************************
Buffy: "I'll check Backer's office. See if I can find any post-its marked 'why a monster might want me dead.'"
Xander: "Sounds like a plan."
Buffy: "Course, if I find anything, I won't know what it means, so, Will..."
Willow: "Oh, yeah, I'm good at medical stuff since Xander and I used to play doctor all the time."
Xander: "No, she's being literal. She used to have all these medical volumes, uh, and diagnosed me with stuff. I didn't have the heart to tell her she was playing it wrong."
Willow: "Wrong? Why?" (to Buffy) "How did *you* play doctor?"
Buffy: (evasively) "I never have."
---(Killed by Death)
********************************************
Fortune Cookies:
"I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places."
---Henny Youngman
"As each child looks at the world through innocent eyes all they can see, Is the worlds way of life and the way they think their lives should be."
---Kandice Hehner
"I've wrestled with reality for 35 years, and I'm happy, Doctor, I finally won out over it".
---Jimmy Stewart, "Harvey"
"I keep six honest serving-men,
They taught me all I knew;
Their names are What and Why and When
And How and Where and Who."
---Rudyard Kipling
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