MONDAY
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Spike: "Oh, lay off. You all had a fine meal. But me? An entire siege - you'd think one of you'd bleed a little."
(Pangs)
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Fortune Cookies:
"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found."
---Calvin Trillin
"I like children. If they're properly cooked."
---W.C. Fields
"It is not the quantity of the meat, but the cheerfulness of the guests, which makes the feast."
---Edward Hyde
"On Thanksgiving Day all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment - halftime."
---Unknown
"A little Consideration, a little Thought for Others, makes all the difference."
---A. A. Milne, "Pooh's Little Instruction Book"
WEDNESDAY
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Giles: "Can I get you anything? Tea? I made a very interesting mousaka last night, if you're hungry."
Buffy: "Pass on the tea. And the moose, thank you."
(Wild at Heart)
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Fortune Cookies:
"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."
---Abraham Lincoln
Lloyd: "It wasn't one bad review in one louse magazine. It was the Restaurant Guide Book of New York. And, when the Restaurant Guide Book recommends you to Hindus looking for a fun night out of fasting, what did you expect me to do, change the menus?"
---The Ref
Navin: "He doesn't realise he's dealing with sophisticated people here. Marie, now just stay calm. Stay calm. Don't look down, don't look down! Look up! Just keep your eyes up and keep them that way, o.k.! Waiter there are snails on her plate. Now get them out of here before she sees them! Look away, just look away, keep your eyes that way! You would think that in a fancy restaurant at these prices you could keep the snails off the food! There are so many snails there you can't even see the food! Now take those away and bring us those melted cheese sandwich appetizers you talked me out of!"
---The Jerk
Rocky: " And now here's something we hope you'll really like!"
---The Rocky & Bullwinkle Show
FRIDAY
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Willow: "So you're feeling better about Angel?"
Buffy: "Well, we talked. And then he ripped out the heart of a demon and fed it to me, and then we talked some more."
Willow: "See, that's how it should work."
(Earshot)
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Fortune Cookies:
"Red meat is not bad for you. Now blue-green meat, that's bad for you!"
---Tommy Smothers
"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage, We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays".
---Henny Youngman
"It would be nice if the Food and Drug Administration stopped issuing warnings about toxic substances and just gave me the names of one or two things still safe to eat."
---Robert Fuoss
"The most wonderful of all things in life, I believe, is the discovery of another human being with whom one's relationship has a glowing depth, beauty, and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing, it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of Divine accident."
---Sir Hugh Walpoe
"Yummy, yummy, yummy
I got love in my tummy
And I feel like lovin' you. . ."
---The Ohio Express
"So if there is anything at all
All you've got to do is call
And you know that I would
Drive 10,000 miles
Just to show you that I care
Just to kiss your honey hair
And pull you close
And hold you like a child
Love heals everything
We're no exception to that rule"
---Shawn Mullins," You Mean Everything to Me"
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